The LDR Song

Isipin Mo Na Lang

Sung by: Bayang Barrios
Composed by: Mike Villegas
From the album: ALON
OST of Ang Pagdadalaga ni Maximo Oliveros

Nangangamba ka ba
Na ngayong malayo ka
Ako kaya ay magbago

Hinahanap ko ba sa iba ang ligaya
Ngayong tayo’y magkalayo

Manatili’t huwag matinag
Sa pag-ibig mo ay bihag
Ang puso kong ito

Isipin mo na lang, ang ating samahan
At ang pag-ibig ko sa ‘yo
Isipin mo na lang, ang ating samahan
At ang pag-ibig ko sa ‘yo

Isipin mo na lang, ngayong natagpuan
Tunay na magmamahal sa akin
At ang nag-iisang hadlang
Ay ang pansamantalang paghihintay
Ba’t di ko gagawin

Manatili’t huwag matinag
Sa pag-ibig mo ay bihag
Ang puso kong ito

Not everybody can appreciate long distance relationship as it is.

They say it's a waste of time and a lot of struggle. Ergo, too exhausting, too expensive and very impractical.

But when you're into an LDR, one has to invest a lot of trust and love. It involves greater risk on both part since physical presence is absent.

To trust that love is reason enough to keep a person away from temptaions and human vulnerabilities...

To trust that love will withstand the distance and the loneliness...

To trust that love will wait for the realization of that one great dream of being reunited once more and be with each other for good...

The same sentiments and dream I share with other people whose distance did not deter them from letting love get through the other end -- across borders, beyond miles and separated by geographic locations.

Very Private Me

I spent Christmas today in the confines of our house. Savoring solitude. Quite contrary to what my sister cum brother is doing right this very moment -- partying to the loud music and 20,000% sure that his stomach is already an alcohol reservoir.

I'm not having a lonely Christmas. Truth be told, I am very happy nowadays and at peace with myself -- despite the fact that Sun Cellular is non-existent still, Smart had ceased their Unlimited Text, soon I have to attend the corporate stockholders' meeting of PLDT due to my expensive phone bill, among others.

I realized that I need not go public for most of the time and blab to the whole world about what makes me tick, what makes me glow. If there's anything my relationship has taught me, it's the value of being private about personal matters which I used to rebel against.

I didn't get my coveted Nokia N70 or the iPod video this Christmas but I got the best gift I ever had way ahead of the yuletide season...



... and I know where I truly belong.

Maxi and Me

I had the chance to watch this film a couple of days ago at Glorietta. Funny and heart-warming.

I was not quite amused with Maxi and his gay friends since I grew up together with my younger brother who chose to have a sexuality different from that of when he was born.

You should meet my sister cum brother -- I tell you, he's a lot funnier.

What struck me though was the acceptance of his father despite their macho image in their area. Such rare instances! My father accepted my brother easily despite my father's tough personality. My father knew it was a pure personal choice his son made and that he could never undo nor interfere with.

Most gay people I know are still hiding in their closets. Afraid of the repercussions and "shame" they would bring to their family once their well-kept secret is revealed.

I find our society so hypocrite when it comes to our gay and lesbian community. We laugh at them yet we despise the thought that one of our family members might be one of them.

We think how lewd it would be -- a man to man or a femme to femme relationship. And had forgotten that for most of the time, a relationship involves love primarily and not just about sex. We see the dot but not the entirety of the paper.

Homosexuality is not a communicable disease nor a crime.

It's a choice and as a choice, I give them high regards.

It is not embarrassing either to choose your own sexuality nor an aberration of your genetic make up. Moralists and holier than thou will surely debate me about my stand but I say, cast thy first stone.

I respect my gay and lesbian brothers and sisters as much as I respect any person. Their choice of lifestyle doesn't make them any less normal at all. Why be ashamed of them?

They are even a lot greater individual for sticking with their decision and proud of it. They have the guts to go against the tide and be ok with it.

I wish people would stop the prejudice and the judgemental attitude -- they're just manifesting how under developed their mental faculties are.

The Big Fish

When I was growing up, I could vividly remember how certain I was of my plan for ehem... being the President of this country (my military allies and COMELEC friendships will surely help me cheat...errr... win, I meant) and go for world domination. And while I was busy occupying my mind with the idea of taking over this entire planet, my playmates and classmates alike were busy planning how to get boys' attentions, their dream guys and fantasy weddings.

Until I got a bit older, instilled in my mind the same nasty plans and always driven to go one step higher and get out of the usual mediocrity. On the other hand, I had changed friends from high school to college to Masteral to Law School but I still hear the same things my childhood friends were also discussing before, only this time, the plans grew more elaborate and quite expensive.

Right from the very start, I knew marriage was not for me.

I grew up in a conventional and traditional family... so stop trying to analyze why I have this skewed concept over myself and marriage... THEN.

I just didn't see myself sharing my bed to anybody else but me. I never wanted anybody seeing me sleeping, my face half buried in the pillow, disheveled hair and all that crap in the morning. I didn't like the idea of cooking for anybody else unless I wanted to. My idea of fun is being in solitude. The house to myself.

I didn't want anybody to see the other side of me -- the vulnerable one, the mushy one, the spiritual one, the childish one and yes, even my ugly temper. I had built a solid fortress around me for so long and I never wanted someone to intrude up until love knocked in my highly-guarded castle and I knew right then it would be chaotic and would bring havoc and mayhem to the semblance of order that I have.

And out of all the mistakes I have committed in my life, I knew loving was the most correct thing I ever did and this time, I knew my heart is beating right.

Now, I don't want to be the "Big Fish" that refuses to be caught. I joined my friends in the wagon of love -- in their dreams of "That Day" and "The One". I am quite fine with the idea of being weak and vulnerable in front of that person. Letting my true colors show. Being crazy in love and finally, letting somebody sleep with me in the same bed.

I don't mind if I don't get to dominate the world... No more plans of one currency and one passport... But don't be fooled -- I still want to be the Chief Executive of this country (say your prayers Francis Escudero!). Just for the time being, my biological and social clocks are ticking. Politics can wait and so is Malacanang.

Truly some things in this life can never be postponed or suspended nor be discarded because we thought they would never materialize and vanished the thought of great possibilities and of endless chances.

God is indeed good and that life is beautiful.

Right now, life couldn't get any better than settling down with the one I love and finally getting to say this vow... until death do us part.